No need for a long intro, here’s Day 3 of the best Stoic quotes to help meet whatever lies ahead today. In case you missed it, here’s Day 2. The focus for these is on starting to take responsibility for your life and the trajectory you’re on. Nothing changes until YOU change. I hope these find you well:
1. “Concern should drive us into action and not into a depression. No man is free who cannot control himself” – Pythagoras
I have found this one to be difficult to manage effectively recently. I tend to find that when I get overwhelmed, my mind seeks cheap pleasures to try to distract from the mountain of work that needs to get done. Learning how to say no to these distractors is a difficult, but necessary skill for success.
Personally, I find it most helpful to start your day by not getting distracted. If you start your day without going straight to your phone for social media, you’re already a step ahead; if you can resist that simple urge in the morning, it sets up a solid foundation for your day.
Take whatever time you need to wake up, and then start with a very simple task on your to do list. At least for me, I find that I gain productive momentum that I want to keep going after I’ve started.
The point of avoiding social media first thing in the morning is because you’ll eventually have to work on breaking the momentum you’ve built with that, and that’s such an incredibly difficult thing to do. It’s much easier to avoid the bad habit altogether, than it is to try to stop once you’ve started.
You know what you need to get done in the day, now it’s up to you to get moving on it. Be the person that willingly accepts the responsibilities of life, rather than just begrudgingly going through the motions. You’ll find your attitude changes significantly when you go head first into your problems, rather than doing the bare minimum to try to get by.
2. “The superior man makes the difficulty to be overcome his first interest; success only comes later” – Confucius
Delayed gratification can be a really hard pill to swallow. We naturally want to know that our efforts will have an immediate and measurable outcome. For long term success, it’s really important to understand that it’s not usually one big win that gets you there, it’s the accumulation of many small wins over time.
Those small wins don’t feel significant in the moment, so many people tend to give up because they’re not seeing the progress that they want. If you don’t want to be like everyone else, you need to stick with it, and trust that your success will come with time.
The important part is prioritizing all the small things that you know need to get done, and making that your first interest. It’s not glamorous, but it’s what many successful people attribute their achievements to. Continue to focus on the problem at hand, and you’ll soon find yourself way further along than you anticipated.
3. “Do not impose on others what you yourself do not desire” – Confucius
This is the trait of a really good leader. Many think being in a leadership role means delegating all the work to those beneath you, but that’s not always the case. In order to build trust from those around you, they need to know you’re willing to put in equal effort at all times too.
This principle doesn’t just apply in leadership roles though. People have a really good sense of when they’re being taken advantage of. There’s nothing wrong with asking others for help, but if you’re only doing it because you don’t wish to do the work that’s ahead of you, then people can sense that.
On the same token, it’s also unfair to make a decision that makes your life easier, but adds the burden to someone else.
As a broad example, in school or work, getting tasked with a group project. Of course it’s easier to have everyone else do all of the work, but it’s your responsibility to carry your weight. Even when no one is watching, you have to be the person that takes full accountability for their responsibilities, and is someone that others can rely on.
Burdening others with the difficulties of life you’re too scared to take on comes at the cost of the trust and respect of those around you.
4. “Good character is not formed in a week or a month. It is created little by little, day by day. Protracted and patient effort is needed” – Heraclitus
I think it is a big error of thinking to believe that we can drastically change who we are in a moment’s notice. I understand we all have the ideal in our head of the person we would like to be, but it’s hard to make that switch. That’s not to say it’s impossible, but it’s going to take time to break old habits, old ways of thinking, and to slowly become aware of faults that you didn’t know you have.
While you’re working on reshaping your character, this is the time where you have to be patient with yourself while you stumble to your new ideal. You’re going to slip up sometimes, and you’re going to make mistakes, but that’s all a part of the process.
Your goal should be focusing on being more aware of your negative thought patterns and habits, and really starting to analyze why you’ve adopted those. Rather than getting caught up in emotion, if you can look at your thoughts objectively, it’s much easier to let those feelings go.
Really start to visualize the ideal person that you would like to become, and start to act in accordance with how that person would act. You’re not going to be perfect with this in the beginning, but all we’re chasing is gradual progress. When you start to become more conscientious of your thoughts and actions, you’ll slowly be able to shape yourself into the person that you actually want to be.
5. “Employ your time in improving yourself by other men’s writings, so that you shall gain easily what others have labored hard for” – Socrates
Reading is such a powerful way to condense so much learning in a small amount of time. These great writers have spent countless hours acquiring the knowledge that you can gain in just a few moments. Don’t underestimate how much there is to gain from the writings of others.
You’ve heard the saying countless times, “Don’t reinvent the wheel”; the same idea applies here too. For a simple example, if you’re trying to learn how to ride a bike or tie a tie, you don’t need to figure it out yourself. So many people have done it before you, so take advantage of this opportunity, rather than the painful process of trial and error.
You don’t need to read a book a week to start changing your life. If you’re looking for an easy habit, then start with 10 pages per day. If you find the self development books that interest you, you’d be surprised with how much helpful info you can learn over the course of a couple weeks.
Conclusion
Nothing changes if nothing changes! Assuming responsibility for your life can be an overwhelming and terrifying thought at first; after you take an honest assessment of yourself, it should become a comfort to know that YOU are solely responsible for the change in your life. The comfort comes from knowing that you don’t have to rely on others to make any changes, it all comes from yourself. If you’re truly willing to make the changes, then it’s well within your ability to make it happen. Get incredibly focused on what you’d like to make of your life. Really take the time to sculpt/design the person you want to be, and start taking small actions towards it. Many others have been on the same path you’re pursuing, so don’t be afraid to look for help in others that are further along; there are plenty of books and online articles/videos that can get you moving in the right direction. Be excited for the future that lies ahead of you, and be proud as you carve your own path. You’ll stumble and fall sometimes, but keep patience with yourself, and the rewards will come with time.